Pessimism

My mind was not made to deal with finances. I know this sounds strange because I'm known for being financially responsible, but that's mainly because I fear money. It confuses me. And it bores me. In the past, I have said that the surest way to cure my insomnia would be to repeat words like "mortgage" and "interest rates" and "escrow" into my ear. Just the sounds of those words would send my eyelids sagging.

Strange how those words are now keeping me awake at night.

The last 10 days or so have been hellishly stressful for me. The work involved in picking a mortgage lender was almost enough to give me a stroke. I felt utterly hopeless & overwhelmed by pessimism. I had horrific headaches, dizziness, and even random twitchiness. I barely ate. I slept only a couple hours per night. I couldn't drive. I didn't get dressed for days. I began to feel very odd sensations in my head & began to worry that the stress was affecting the cyst in my brain (the beloved Brain Spider). It was baaaaaaad, kids. Very bad. Loved ones became concerned for my health and urged me to contact a neurologist. But I knew - I KNEW! - that as soon as we were finally able to settle on a mortgage lender, I would feel better. Easier said than done, sadly, but it is done now. Finally. Finally done.

I could bore you with the details, but I see no need to torture you as I have been tortured over the past 2 weeks. Instead, I'll just tell you that (a) despite what we had been told originally, the company we really wanted to work with was able to find the time to work with us afterall and (2) they were able to offer us a rate that will save us thousands of dollars.
Hallelujah!
If you're looking for proof that there is a God, this may well be it. Or maybe it's thanks to the 4-leaf clover from my last post. One or the other. At any rate, once I heard from the manager of the mortgage department at Prefered Lender Co., I suddenly felt such relief. It's all going to be okay now. Whew!

But as the photo suggests, there is still much more to do. There's more paperwork to send to loan officers & attorneys & agents & inspectors. And bills to pay. And boxes to pack. And more money just flowing out of our hands than I care to think about. But the headaches & pessimism are fading. I even managed to sleep last night.